Nikki In a Nutshell

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Yesterday a friend shared an encouraging thought about an address with me.

I’ve learned to copy & paste! TWICE 😄

When a GROWN ASS MAN will 1. hunt your daddy down on the street, 2. go by your mother’s house, 3. show up at your son’s job (being MORE THAN TWICE HIS AGE) asking about YOU, 4. KNOWING his numbers have been blocked for years now, 5. and THEN sit and wait on your property for you to come OR go, 6. BLOCK YOU FROM ESCAPE 7. & RUN UP ON YOU, LITERALLY, all over a period of MANY MONTHS, … what that mean? Tell me. My life has been littered with such ‘entitled beings’. I know them when I see them/hear them speak, close to immediately. These usually get right down to business … So do I.

… you know you AIN’T … (not my lover) … you know you CAIN’T … (not my lover) …

Was going through some old papers and notebooks today with the purpose of parting with most off it filing & even packing bits. I’ve been dreading getting with this stuff for years. Yes years. I believe that I must go through every single piece of paper front & back. So I got started. I’d come across a notebook full of my personal thoughts from 2018. It was a blast from the past! I enjoy reading my entries after much time has gone by. I always always always see growth. I too see where I felt ‘stuck’ where I ask Jehovah for help & where I am vulnerable. I’m honest & much more open when I write & I absolutely love writing.

I’ve been wrestling with this for some time now. Been layin’ LOW. Tryin’ to keep ‘the’ peace but catchin’ ‘the’ noise & confusion still. Denyin’ myself of the life that I am to make way for the rest of the nonsense. NO MORE. Now you gonna get it.

My brand new Mazda 626. 5 speed manual transmisson. Black with tan leather seats. Golden dark brown tinted windows … ’97 Dodge Caravan with built in car seats for two new (back to back) little ones! I didn’t know what I had potential included. What I know for sure now is priceless! Ready, get be and stay. There’ll always be moves to be made.

I’d planned to be in Maine by 2007. I’m not sure when I set my mind on leaving but I had a delay in plans as early as 1994. It’s been 27 years, at least, and I’m still here poised to make any of several moves. I’ve done plenty over the 27 years, wasted a lot of time & money. I’ve too learned many crucial life lessons & discovered much about myself that I definitely needed to know. Planet Earth has gotten much bigger in the meantime & in between time! I have so many more options & so much more to learn … along the way, this time around!