Author: Nikki In a Nutshell

‘That one day someone, anyone,would come along & ‘get it’, understand me fundamentally, simply by observing & listening … by wanting to, for unselfish reasons’ … & not giving up so incredibly quickly & easily. Including & not limited to friendships. I’m grateful that I do well by myself, even preferring it. I understand that if one doesn’t understand him/herself, having NOT done their own shadow work, would surely be unable to grasp the essence of me. So it doesn’t upset me in the least bit … I just carry on. When matters become one sided for me, as they often do, I have to take my leave. HOWEVER, I’ve had success over the years with a handful of wonderful people! I, too, expect that they expect what they expect out of me & I am willing to show up reasonably. So, I no longer lie to myself when new people enter my space/world/life thinking that ‘this one’ will ‘get it’, be willing & able to go deep & remain true to themselves … because it often times ain’t true. #bloganuary

LOL! Location location location. If only it be picked up & planted elsewhere! #bloganuary

This is gonna be difficult, if not impossible, for me since my personality is multi-faceted … like the play of light on a diamonds multi-faceted surface … color … go ahead … pick one. #bloganuary

is … (drum roll, please!) … chicken noodle soup! Everything about my chicken noodle soup, for me, is delightful. From shopping for its ingredients to snuggling up in my bed (yes, I eat in MY bed) with a big hot cute bowl of it! Chicken noodle soup is ‘had’ all year round in my home. It’s worth all the effort that it requires. #bloganuary

I’d have to draw from a period of roughly 7 years the many moments, hours, & sleepless nights over where & when I learned just how cruel some people can be. Including those who ought never be on such a list of individuals. I learned at the same time that it was now my sole responsibility to protect love & nurture myself & to never relegate another with this precious duty. But I had to learn how to do it, what it was gonna take for/from me to get it done the right way & continue throughout all my days. Meanwhile, I had to stop caring about a few choice individuals, abruptly & completely. ‘&’ about what the ‘shift’ was gonna look like to others. Believe it or not, you will lose people when you set out on such a journey to take care of yourself. And a journey it has been! It ain’t no point A to point B … & it ain’t for sissy’s, let’s be clear on that… it’s a straight up journey … a beautiful one … at times difficult, exhausting, & lonely but worth every minute of it. Truly. I know myself now and will admit I had no clue before. I am kind to myself & have a good sense of what’s good for me (& what is not). I have no problem saying NO. I’ve too learned that ‘no’ is a complete sentence, no explanations. This is one of the greatest things I could’ve done for myself, my health & my sanity. Without the unnecessary outside negative energy draining interferences over this crucial period of time, I’ve become quite the human being … that ‘I’ love & appreciate. What another may think of me otherwise … is none of my business. #bloganuary

Hey baby let’s get away, let’s go somewhere far, baby can we? Where, I don’t care … #bloganuary

Not interested at all in deep sea diving but will leave TODAY for outer space! #bloganuary

It’s cold & raining today … my kinda weather … #bloganuary

… make up your mind. I’ve done it for you. #bloganuary

I’ll never forget bath times courtesy of my great-grandmother at my grandmothers house! Then, it was the deepest widest bathtub I knew. The water was always either a bit too hot or just right bringing out in my skin red undertones & the perfect cool sweat! She would always say theses words, “stand up … turn around … sit down …” amongst other things having nothing to do with my bath. I was so fascinated with the bar of soap though … it seemed ‘alive’ as it would float all around the tub carried by the constant movement of the water … impossible at times to catch when Mama would ask me to ‘get it’! Ivory Soap was its name & making fond bath time memories for me was it’s game. I last used Ivory soap, I think, was in my teenage years. Decades later I can still smell my bath water. Nothing can compare to the scent of Ivory soap. #bloganuary